Picking Rocks

Posted by The Divine Cowgirl on June 16th, 2009 at 08:38am

I grew up in Rock Island, a small town on the edge of the Columbia River in Eastern Washington. Apparently before the dam was installed the river flowed over the ground the teeny town was built on. And that means the ground was once river bed. The best crop Rock Island grows is rocks. Ok, so that is an exaggeration, but even the orchards that surround the area have to deal with the crop of rocks.

The bottom line is twice a year (or more) the newly surfaced rocks must be collected and relocated out of the middle of the arena, the pasture or the garden. I swear no miracle grow is necessary to enhance the size of the crop. And I promise the biggest treasure will be found exactly where you want to set a fence post.

In order to have a fertile field or usable arena, the land has to be groomed and worked. All debris, be it rock or vegetation (weeds) needs to be relocated so the vision of the space can be realized. In many ways there is a parallel with the preparation of our interior landscape. Divine Cowgirl’s homestead their inner landscape. They lay claim to the vision of their lives. The work of the interior space requires removing the rocks of our family of origin, religion of origin, culture of origin and even school of origin (how we learned to learn). We must sort through the rules, way of doing things and the system stories before we can claim our own understanding of our lives.

Systems, (be it family, organizations or cultures) have both conscious and unconscious rules of operation and we are often trained into the “rules” of each of the systems unchallenged. All systems have the need to fight against change and yet it is part of our journey to consciously decide the rules we want to live by. We are called to move beyond our unconscious conditioning and determine our way of being in the world.

There is a well told story that illustrates how we pass along generational information regardless of what system it is in.

A young woman observing three generations of women cooking Thanksgiving dinner watched as her mother cut off the two ends of the ham and placed it into the pan for the oven. She asked why her mother always did that. The mother replied, “I don’t know; ask your grandmother.” Her grandmother didn’t know either, so they turned to the great-grandmother who replied, “Because my pan was too small!”

Paul Harvey told a story of a Russian soldier that was posted to a patch of dirt. There was an inquiry as to the purpose of guarding dirt and several months later the answer was at one time the patch of dirt was Katharine the Great’s rose garden. The system simply did what it has always done regardless of its insanity until challenged.

Systems seldom review and update the norms and rules it operates by. What may have been a good idea at one time may no longer serve under the present conditions. A current example is the school year. The calendar was set during agricultural times and though most people now live in cities and suburbs that would benefit from year round school, we as a culture are slow to change.

The Divine Cowgirl must do a rock picking party. She must be willing to examine the rules she has taken on from the systems she has participated in. Here are some rocks she might want to examine:

What do you believe about money? Do you believe there is never enough? Are you driven to buy beyond your means to put up appearances? Do you shop as an addiction? Do you hide the truth from your partner about your spending? Do gamble looking for the big one?
What do you believe about relationship? Are you looking for someone to take care of you or do you come to the relationship expecting to be a partner? Is it a place where you tell the truth or keep secrets? How do you deal with conflict? How is love defined?
What do you believe about authority? Do you see people in authority positions as having all the answers or as people who have their own perceptions, opinions and stories grounded in their own histories? Do you do your own research and come to your own conclusions or simply swallow whole what the position tells you to think or believe?
Do you believe in your dreams or do you set them aside because you watched others before you do that? Or do you follow the path you are told you “should” follow because your parents want you to believe they know how your life should be? Are you waiting for someone to die so that you can be free to have your own life?

These are but a few of the “rocks” to pick up and examine as you prepare your inner landscape to support your inner vision.

It takes sweat equity to pick the rocks that have surfaced in your inner landscape. Some people pick up the rock and then continue to carry it forward because they are afraid to let it go. I promise if you carry enough of your FOO (family of origin), ROO (religion of origin), COO (culture of origin), and SOO (school of origin) rocks they will weight down both your spirit and dream. Sometimes the best thing you can do with the rock is to leave it behind, or create a fence or maybe a fire pit. The point is the norm or rule no longer serves the time you are living in. And it takes courage or heart to stand in your own knowing and ideas.

Picking rocks is continuous practice. It is part of our reflection and becoming awake or conscious to our life. I invite you to begin to clear your interior space. Use your journal to ask questions about the rules you have been operating by. Each rock your pick allows more space for your dreams to grow. Life is short. Your dreams count. Your discoveries matter. Why not begin today, just one rock. Who knows what your inner landscape will grow…..

The Divine Cowgirl

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